Done

[blueartemis07]

I'm done. I'm so done. Managed to get ghosted twice this week. It is amazing. And so, the apps are now done, the accounts disabled. I may try again one day or I may not. It isn't worth it. I worked very hard to gain my independence... maybe this is a sign from the universe.

What I want to say it is is very self-pitying, so I won't, but boy am I feeling it right now.

I did get my nails done. That was the me thing this week.

Comments

[satismagic]

*sends a ton of hugs* You've been terribly brave how you've thrown yourself into the dating circus. Take a break, and honestly, I think you may have more success simply doing things you love in a way where you meet other people, be it classes or services or events... I've always met the best people via shared interests. Not because "meeting someone" was the goal.

[blueartemis07]

Yes, I know. It will happen. I just need to be ready and let it happen organically. But no classes, and you can see what I wrote to astrosthknot.

[satismagic]

Makes sense. Then consider “classes” as a symbol for “any activity you enjoy that requires several people”. Dungeons and dragons! Cosplay? But yeah, just let things happen. You can’t force things… and it IS supposed to be fun, not work.

[blueartemis07]

Maybe when life is more normal. Right now, being the thought of being indoors with lots of people gives me hives.

[satismagic]

I feel that so much! But maybe you can find something outdoors you’ve always wanted to try or explore…?

[blueartemis07]

I may get to that point, when walking a block doesn't exhaust me. My body went through hell, and recovery isn't as fast as I'd like.

These aren't excuses. I appreciate everyone's good thoughts and advice. I just have to find my own way forward.

[blueartemis07]

I don't know. I will try.